April 7, 2008

100th post

Posted in Journal tagged , , , , at 4:22 pm by Jenn

4th of July 1997 or 1998

I’m not sure what made me think of this today, but I did and this is perhaps one of the craziest experiences I’ve ever had. I also cannot believe that this is my 100th post, but it is according to my newly formatted wordpress dashboard!

I was living with my best friend Tracy in Upper Marlboro. Our friends Brian and Mike lived around the corner. It was the 4th of July and none of us had any specific plans. Somehow we ended up at a strip club in Washington DC.

This is where the crazy part comes in…

At some time during the evening either Tracy or I had to go to the bathroom. Well, the only women’s restroom in a strip club is used by the strippers so…we were escorted in by our waitress. There were two stalls, both were occupied.

Very uncomfortable sounds were coming from stall #1. Tracy and I were checking our make-up in the mirror and tried to ignore these sounds. Then this transpired:

Voice from stall #1: “Who’s out there?”
Waitress: “Candi (made up name, but very likely that it could be what she said), with two customers who needed to use the bathroom”
Voice for stall #1: “Tell ‘em not to eat the pizza!” – Now at this point I’m ready to burst in to tears. I’m sure that Tracy said something to the voice in the stall but I can’t remember. – Tracy if you are reading this (though doubtful) feel free to chime in.

Stripper emerges from stall #2 – I go in. The stripper from stall #1 comes out and this transpires:

Voice now outside the stall: “Does anyone have any cologne?”
Random stripper: “I have some Vanilla spray”
Voice now outside the stall: “I don’t care”. “I just need something.”

I come out of the stall and am washing my hands at the sink. I see the stripper take the vanilla spray and spray it on her most private areas. I can’t help but notice that she is wearing a white thong type bathing suit outfit, and has a HUGE rhinestone in her naval. She leaves the bathroom.

Tracy and I go back to the table…amused and disgusted. We sit down and look up on stage and who do you think is up on stage dancing her heart out? That’s right….Ms. Vanilla Bean.

We could hardly stand it.  We encouraged Mike and Brian to go up and give to the girl some money….they accepted (of course). When they came back we asked them if she smelled like vanilla. Both had puzzled looks on their faces…until we told them the story. Then they weren’t so amused.

Hey, that’s what friends are for!



  1. wineymomma said,

    Gotta love the randomness of it all….and eewww!!!

  2. sjsmart said,

    Totally random, and now I can’t stop thinking about it. I was hoping to get it out of my system by blogging about it, but I guess not!

  3. not Goth said,

    LOL made me laugh.

  4. Ruth said,

    All I can think of is that newish children’s book with the slang verb in the title. I’m too much of a prude to spell it out.

    What a funny memory!

  5. not Goth said,

    Ruth link to it at least!!

  6. sjsmart said,


    I have heard of that book! Why have I heard of that book?

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