September 23, 2012

Playing The Name Game

Posted in Journal tagged , , at 11:37 am by Jenn

In the recent months I’ve spent more time studying names than I have clinical nutrition which may be a problem as I enter the last class for my Master’s Degree, but that’s a post for another day. Names…

Everyone has one. One of the most important things our parents give to us is our name. As Scott and I prepare to become parents not only are we choosing which room to make the nursery, what crib and baby monitoring system to buy, we are also choosing names. Names…

People protect them. How often do you hear about someone “stealing” someone else’s name? Expectant moms often times won’t tell what names they are considering for fear of someone “taking” their name. I used to think this was ridiculous and I never quite understood it, until I started playing the name game. I mean seriously, how many names are really made up? Names are communal, there are thousands of them, and chances are you aren’t the only ________ (insert your name here) out there.

As a Jennifer growing up in the 70’s, I was never alone. I reluctantly became a “Jeni” as a teen – and even though my number isn’t 867-5309, I have given it out a few times. Growing up I would have liked to have had a name that was a little more unique – although the alternative was Davidene so I really am grateful for my parent’s choice of Jennifer.

For my child, any name in the Social Security Most Popular Baby Names (top 50) for the past 5 years is out of the question. I don’t want something so popular, nor do I want something so off the wall that he/she is made fun of or spends a lifetime correcting spelling, pronunciation or dreading role call in class. Names…

Names have meaning. We’ve all seen them, the baby name books. We’ve all looked up our own names, names of our loved ones, etc. I’ve spent hours and hours scanning these books looking for just the right names to put on the list. I’ve always liked “an” names. Beginning or end, doesn’t matter. I definitely want a name of Irish, Celtic or Gaelic origin. The internet also has a lot of sites to help sort through the sea of names. Some favorites are Behind the Name, The Baby Name Wizard and Baby Center. Names…

People’s opinions matter. Parents want unusual, unique names for their kids but in reality the kid just wants to fit in. Scott and I recently came to agreement on a few names…thank goodness, but he was still resisting my favorite – Lorcan.  Yesterday I ran down my list of favorites with a group of friends and was sad that none of them liked my favorite boy name either. How could they not like Lorcan?  It’s perfect – it ends in “an”, it’s Irish, it means little fierce one, it sounds good with our last name (as an added bonus there are two Harry Potter characters with this name), so what’s not to love?

After a good night’s sleep, today I’m crossing “Lorcan” off the list, and here’s why…

Lorcan, Lorcan bo-borcan, Banana fanfana fo-forcan, mee mi mo-morcan, LORCAN.

I’d like to give a special “thank you” to Adry (for Lorcan Dorkan), and the name game for helping me to see the light.

August 5, 2012

Just Love Coffee Fundraiser

Posted in Journal tagged , , , at 12:11 pm by Jenn

Scott and I are raising funds for our adoption with Just Love Coffee.  With this fundraiser, you can buy individual bags, shirts, hats, mugs, etc or join the club and get a bag or two delivered every month!  So, if you drink coffee or know someone who does, this is the perfect chance to buy.  Just Love Coffee with give us a portion of every purchase to put toward our adoption.  We plan to continue the fundraiser through the adoption procress, but why not visit the site and make a purchase today? 

We have signed on with American Adoptions and will hopefully have our profile active by the end of the month.  We are meeting with them this week to discuss our adoption situation preferences. 

American Adoptions has two different adoption programs, traditional and agency assisted.  We chose to enter the agency assisted program.  In this program the infants will be African American or African American mixed with anything else.  We don’t have any preference for gender.  The hard part comes in choosing what medical conditions (in the birth mom or birthmom’s family) we will accept.  Then we have to consider drug and alcohol use.  Once we decide that, then we have to decide on the frequency of use.  Honestly it really is all kind of overwhelming, but will be well worth it in the long run. 

We can’t wait to bring “Baby Smart” home.

August 4, 2012

Adoption Update and Fundraising

Posted in Journal tagged , at 9:18 am by Jenn

Well we made it through the homestudy!  It wasn’t as bad as I’d anticipated.  I did feel at times like my character was being questioned, and my upbringing was being critiqued…and they were, but in the end what matters is that we were approved and can now move on to the profile and match process.

Our fundraising efforts are continuing.  I wanted to avoid the usual pizza, donuts, wrapping paper because quite frankly I’m tapped out on those during the school year with all the kids.  In searching for unique fundraising opportunities I found a great company called Just Love Coffee Roasters.  A little something different and who knows, maybe, just maybe we’ll be able to reach our next goal!

Please visit our storefront and consider placing an order.  Every purchase puts us closer to becoming parents!   

March 5, 2012

Adoption Journey Begins

Posted in Journal tagged , at 11:17 pm by Jenn

Dear friends and family,

When we started out on this adoption journey we had no idea what we would be in store for.  In the past month, we have learned a lot about the process, and ourselves.  We finally managed to pick an agency that we are interested in working with.

Sadly adoption has become a big business not only internationally, but right here in the United States.  The cost is HUGE and we’ve learned that this adoption will cost in the neighborhood of $25,000.   

I know that sounds like a lot (and it is), but we will receive about $12,000 back from the Adoption Tax Credit, $2,000 reimbursement from the military and $5000 back from DaVita (Jenn’s employer).  That means that we will receive over half of the cost of the adoption back (which is FANTASTIC). However, we will need to have the ALL the money up front, in order to be prepared for the day a birth mother selects us to be the adoptive parents for her special gift.  The money does not go directly to the birth mother, it goes to the agency who will use the money for advertising on our behalf with profiles and Internet, help to cover birth mother expenses if needed, and to pay agency and legal fees. 

Through our agency we can set the budget for the adoption so we know what to expect.  The average cost for adoption in 2011 (through this agency) was $25000 and ranges from $22000- $28000.  We’ll pay a little over $5000 initially (for profiles and Internet marketing), plus the cost of the home study (about $1500) the remainder is due when we have been matched with a birth mother.

Next on our “to do” list is the home study which should take about 2 months to complete.  Once the home study is complete the agency will start to show our profile to birth mothers.  Hopefully as soon as June!  That means that we could potentially have a baby by summer time…very scary, but exciting to think that it could happen that quickly. Once our home study is completed and reviewed by the agency they say that our wait will be 1-12 months.

Words cannot express the joy and excitement we feel as we prepare for the blessing that is about to grace our lives.  We would like to invite you to be a part of our adoption.   We have two goals, the first is to create a community of friends, family and neighbors, locally and globally, who are ready and excited to welcome our child into their lives as our son/daughter.  The second is to raise $10,000 toward the total cost to bring our baby home.

We trust that we will be able to raise the funds needed to complete this adoption. One way may be through people like you.  When you give financially, you become emotionally invested. We cannot wait share our joy with you as begin our family.  We cannot wait to hold our baby in our arms, and provide a loving hand for him/her to hold as he/she grows.  Can we count on you to stand behind us as we move forward with this adoption?

Please visit our adoption blog at http://scottandjennadopt.blogspot.com/ and consider making a donation right now. You will see a green box that says “Bringing Home Baby Smart”.  Click on the “Chip In” button and it will take you to an area where you can make your secure donation to our paypal account.  This account is linked to our local bank and the funds will be used only for this adoption and related expenses.

Please contact us if you have any questions, need alternative methods of contribution, or would just like to chat. We would absolutely love to hear from each and every one of you!

Much love and our deepest thanks!

Jenn and Scott

 

Adoption Journey Begins

Posted in Journal at 11:17 pm by Jenn

Dear friends and family,

When we started out on this adoption journey we had no idea what we would be in store for.  In the past month, we have learned a lot about the process, and ourselves.  We finally managed to pick an agency that we are interested in working with.

Sadly adoption has become a big business not only internationally, but right here in the United States.  The cost is HUGE and we’ve learned that this adoption will cost in the neighborhood of $25,000.   

I know that sounds like a lot (and it is), but we will receive about $12,000 back from the Adoption Tax Credit, $2,000 reimbursement from the military and $5000 back from DaVita (Jenn’s employer).  That means that we will receive over half of the cost of the adoption back (which is FANTASTIC). However, we will need to have the ALL the money up front, in order to be prepared for the day a birth mother selects us to be the adoptive parents for her special gift.  The money does not go directly to the birth mother, it goes to the agency who will use the money for advertising on our behalf with profiles and Internet, help to cover birth mother expenses if needed, and to pay agency and legal fees. 

Through our agency we can set the budget for the adoption so we know what to expect.  The average cost for adoption in 2011 (through this agency) was $25000 and ranges from $22000- $28000.  We’ll pay a little over $5000 initially (for profiles and Internet marketing), plus the cost of the home study (about $1500) the remainder is due when we have been matched with a birth mother.

Next on our “to do” list is the home study which should take about 2 months to complete.  Once the home study is complete the agency will start to show our profile to birth mothers.  Hopefully as soon as June!  That means that we could potentially have a baby by summer time…very scary, but exciting to think that it could happen that quickly. Once our home study is completed and reviewed by the agency they say that our wait will be 1-12 months.

Words cannot express the joy and excitement we feel as we prepare for the blessing that is about to grace our lives.  We would like to invite you to be a part of our adoption.   We have two goals, the first is to create a community of friends, family and neighbors, locally and globally, who are ready and excited to welcome our child into their lives as our son/daughter.  The second is to raise $10,000 toward the total cost to bring our baby home.

We trust that we will be able to raise the funds needed to complete this adoption. One way may be through people like you.  When you give financially, you become emotionally invested. We cannot wait share our joy with you as begin our family.  We cannot wait to hold our baby in our arms, and provide a loving hand for him/her to hold as he/she grows.  Can we count on you to stand behind us as we move forward with this adoption?

Please visit our adoption blog at http://scottandjennadopt.blogspot.com/ and consider making a donation right now. You will see a green box that says “Bringing Home Baby Smart”.  Click on the “Chip In” button and it will take you to an area where you can make your secure donation to our paypal account.  This account is linked to our local bank and the funds will be used only for this adoption and related expenses.

Please contact us if you have any questions, need alternative methods of contribution, or would just like to chat. We would absolutely love to hear from each and every one of you!

Much love and our deepest thanks!

Jenn and Scott

 

February 17, 2012

Putting it out there

Posted in Journal tagged , , at 11:24 pm by Jenn

Miscarriage.  There, I said it.

A little over a month ago, Scott and I went to our appointment with the Reproductive Endocrinologist (RE), ready to see our baby’s heartbeat…we left devastated.  “This looks like a miscarriage”.  Those are the last words we expected to hear especially after beating all odds and becoming pregnant in the first place (with the help of IUI).

We took the news in stride and went on with our day to day lives.  “Waiting for nature to take it’s course”.  A week later when nothing had happened we went back to the doctor for another ultrasound.  No change.  Still no heartbeat.  Again we were devastated but ready to move on.  We scheduled the D&C for the next day.

The RE was very optimistic.  “Call me at the beginning of your next cycle and we’ll try again”.  At that time I was game.  Now, a little over a month later, after the physical and mental pain that we’ve decided that we won’t try again.  That doesn’t mean that we don’t want to start a family.  That means that we’ve decided we want to be parents, and we are ready to adopt.

For those of you who have adopted, I am anxious to hear your story.  For those of you who have considered adoption I want to hear your story, and for those of you who have suffered the loss of a child…I feel your pain.

We’ve got a long stress filled road ahead of us, but this is a journey that we are ready to take…at last.

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